Cav's "Gonna Get You Laid" Recipes

[Cavadus]

This post is the start of a new weekly tradition for... me. As most of you are, I'm sure, completely unaware, I loves to cook. A lots. In fact, if it wasn't for my smokin' culinary and wine pairing skills I'd probably get it on with the ladies a lot less. I mean yeah, I'm funny, attractive, super out going, and always have the best "gotta look over your shoulder first" type jokes, but some times you just really need to seal the deal to get the goods.

Now, my extremely sexist and chauvinistic intro aside, I present to you the best recipes I've come across amid my frolicking...

[Cavadus]

Kav's Original Vodka Tomato-Cream Sauce

This one will blow anyone right the fuck over. It's not my personal favorite dish but it is the one people most go ape shit over. It's damn good. Without further adieu...

Ingredient Cost: ~$50.00
Time to Cook: ~40 minutes

Ingredients


1 28oz can of crushed tomatoes, fire roasted if possible
1 of those small cans of tomato paste
1 large yellow onion
black olives
capers (in brine)
crushed red pepper flake
rosemary
oregano
basil
marjoram
1 cup of chicken broth
1 cup of a dry red wine: I prefer a Nebbiolo, Corvina, or Montepulciano though you can make do with a heathen Gaul vintage. Stear clear of Chianti. It just doesn't work.
1 shot of vodka (don't go overboard with this shit because even just doubling this to 2 shots will seriously fuck up your dish and make it completely inedible, I'm not kidding)
1 pint of heavy whipping cream
2 large boneless, skinless chicken breasts
1 normal package of bacon, thickest cut you can find or, and this is what I prefer, just a 1 lb slab of uncut bacon cut how you like
Extra Virgin Olive Oil

Directions

***DO NOT SALT THIS DISH AT ANY POINT***


Take your bacon and microwave it. That's right, microwave the shit. I'm not kidding. I always microwave my bacon. The reason for this is that unless you have some grease for the first few pieces they will come out exceptionally crunchy which I don't like and will just fall apart in the sauce. You want the bacon to be that perfect bacon color but chewy. Unless you microwave the crap out of bacon it will always come out chewy. So just take a plate, cover it with a layer of paper towels, line a layer of bacon on it, cover that with another layer of paper towels, layer of bacon, et cetera, until all bacon is on, cover that with a final topping of paper towels, then microwave for about 7 minutes. You'll be doing other things and more then likely the bacon won't be cooked by then but as you're doing other stuff just keep adding a minute or two until it's perfect. Don't let the bacon sit too long after the microwave turns off though if it still needs to be cooked otherwise the additional time will just dry the shit out because it won't get hot enough to reactivate the cooking action. Got it?
Clean and dress your chicken breasts. I like to remove all fat folds and also cut out the cartilage that is sometimes left near where the shoulder used to be. Julienne or cube it.
In a large sauce pan add a little olive oil and throw in your chicken. Cook it until one or two sides are golden brown. Remove the chicken and set aside.
Add a little more EVOO and turn the heat way down. Take your onion and dice it. Once diced, add it to the sauce pan and turn the heat up to medium high. Cook until the onions are translucent and starting to caramelize.
Lower the heat to low and add in the crushed tomatoes, tomato paste, chicken broth, wine, and vodka. Stir.
Add your herbs to taste. My rule of thumb is generally that I use twice as much basil as I use oregano. So like one tbsp of oregano, two of basil. I have no idea what the fuck marjoram adds but I don't care. Add like a tsp. Be careful with the rosemary. Hopefully you have fresh but if not that's okay. Keep in mind that stored dried herbs only last like six months so if you have some really old shit just toss it the fuck out. Rosemary. Rosemary is a pretty powerful herb and it always pairs well with anything that has cream (hello chicken reisling). I'd add probably 1.5 tbsp. This section is actually really difficult for me because I never, ever use exact measurements for herbs (in fact, I rarely use exact measurements for anything in straight up cooking like this, just baking). I just pile that shit in until I get the flavor I'm looking for. I wouldn't suggest doing that if you're a newb but if you think you've got the chops go nuts. Add your red pepper how you like. I prefer a hint of spicy in my sauce.
Slice your black olives if they aren't already. Add the olives and capers.
Add your cut up chicken. Stir well.
Your bacon should be done by now. Cut it up (a kitchen shears works best) into the sizes you want. I like mine big so like 3/4 of an inch long for me. Add that shit.
Turn the heat up to medium and cover the top with a wire mesh cover. Don't cover the damn pan with an actual cover. We're trying to reduce the vodka, chicken broth, and wine to build a cohesive and nicely thickened sauce.
Let simmer about half an hour. Don't simmer the shit out of it because it'll get gross if you do. I thought I was going to be all fucking studly once and crockpot this shit for like two hours and it was terrible.
Remove from heat and add in the whipping cream. Stir, let sit five minutes; serve.
Bon appetito!

Other Stuffs


Pair with a red wine, the wine you used in the sauce is fine. I personally prefer a Spanish wine called "Tempranillo." You can get it at any decent liquor store and it'll run you from $10-$30 a bottle depending. The $15 stuff is fine. It's a fantastic red that manages to have incredible body, a perfect balance of sweet and bitter, barely tannic flavor, and it's not very dry either. It's my flat out favorite and it works perfectly with this dish.
Noodles. This shit is usually served over noodles and I prefer flat noodles. No, not like linguine or fettuccine, more like bow tie. My personal favorite are the "flower" noodles. Imagine a miniaturized lasagna noodle that is wrapped in the shape of a cone. You want noodles that have knooks for the sauce to get lost in. Don't use fucking macaroni or rigatoni or any type of string noodle.
For a garnish you can't go wrong with some fresh parsley but my personal favorite, and it always impresses the women I serve it to, is to grate large thin flakes of asiago over the dish. Asiago is really creamy and nutty tasting. Top that with parsley and it looks really good.
Other courses: We Italians love bread so get some bread. My personal favorite is a nice warm loaf of rosemary-olive oil. It's amazing. Don't fucking ruin the dish by serving it with butter you savage. Get a pair of dipping trays, throw in some warm EVOO, and then micrograde some parmesean, romano, or asiago right into it. Eat your bread like a civilized person. Salads always go well with this stuff. I prefer vinaigrette myself. My advice for salads is to crush the croutons up into coarse bits, make sure you have some pine nuts in there, and try out butter leaf lettuce. It's exquisite.

So there it is. If this doesn't get you laid nothing will.

[Horizonz]

Zomg! Kav's gunna get me laid! rofl

[Revoco]

this is an awesome thread btw.

[Cavadus]

this is an awesome thread btw.

I was wondering where the fuck you went.

Anyways, a new recipe will be incoming this week. I'm thinking my pan fried chicken scallopini Italian picnic setup. It's a sure thing if y'know what I mean.

[Revoco]

ive been very busy for a change, chasing foreign girls and dicking around in the campus studios... we get keys :)

[Cavadus]

Zuppa Toscana

This is like the best fucking soup in the history of the world.

Ingredient Cost: ~$40.00
Time to Cook: ~60 minutes

Ingredients


1 lbs ground Italian sausage (linked works to but make sure to remove the casing)
1/2 lbs bacon or pancetta. This may sound like blasphemy but I actually vastly prefer bacon over pancetta because pancetta isn't smoked and with bacon that delicious smokiness transfers well to the liquids and sauces you add it to.
1 large yellow onion, diced
1 quart of water
2 14.5 oz cans of chicken stock
2 cups chopped kale (or swiss chard)
2 garlic cloves (pressed or smashed and chopped)
3 large russet potatoes
1 cup of heavy whipping cream
crushed red pepper flake
rosemary
basil
marjoram

Directions


Brown the sausage and the cook the bacon. Cut up your bacon to bite size chunks or whatever the fuck size you want. Set aside.
Cube the potatoes. Leave the skin on, it's good shit and as long you don't over cook the piss out of the potatoes they won't fall off and fuck up the soup.
In large pot combine water, stock, garlic, onion, potatoes, and spices (to taste, amounts are up to you). Boil uncovered until potato cubes are tender.
Add the meat! Continue to boil uncovered for about ten minutes.
Chop up the kale (or chard). Throw it in and let it boil for like five minutes.
Turn off the heat and add the cream.
Bon appetito!

Other Stuffs


Not a lot of notes on this one. Don't pair with a red wine. I'd suggest a white wine but... well, I don't like white wine so I don't drink it.
Bread is a must have for this. The more hearty the better. Works great with a big ass rough artisan loaf.


This is damn good soup. I made it just last night and at this time of the year I get requests all of the time for it (it's getting cold up here, was twenty degrees last night).

Gah, stupid site crash eating my chicken scallopini recipe post I had. I'll get that up sometime.

[Cavadus]

Chocolate-Hazelnut Tart

I'm a huge fan of pecan pie and I have a great fudge pecan pie recipe. The addition of a really dark chocolate cuts through the otherwise and often overwhelming sweetness associated with pecan pie and it's corn syrup based filling.

This, however, is a step above my fudge pecan pie recipe and also my rum pecan pie recipe. Well, the rum recipe is hella good when it's super fucking rummy but I still like this more.

Ingredient Cost: ~$30.00 assuming you have a lot of this shit on hand already (and you should)
Time to Cook: ~60 minutes

Ingredients

Crust

1/3 cup of food processored (lol at that word) almond slices
1 cup of flour
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/4 cup sugar
2 tablespoons chilled butter, cubed
2 tablespoons canola oil
1 egg white

Filling

1/2 cup sugar
2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
3 eggs, beaten
1 1/2 cups peeled, chopped, and toasted hazelnuts
1 (normal sized) bag of bittersweet chocolate chips
1 cup corn syrup
2 tablespoons butter, melted
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon salt

Directions

Filling

Preheat oven to 325 degrees F.
In a large bowl mix together the sugar and flour.
Add the eggs, hazelnuts. chocolate chips, corn syrup, butter, vanilla, and salt.
Stir well and pour into pie crust.
Bake for 1 hour.

Crust

Mix processed almonds, flour, salt, cinnamon, nutmeg, and sugar together in a bowl.
Take the chilled butter and cut it into slivers. Throw it in the bowl. Ditto for the oil.
Mix well. Add the egg white.
Roll it out onto a floured counter top or other space and kneed it for about ten minutes.
Roll flat and place in a 9" pan and bake for about eight minutes.
Let cool before filling with the... filling.
Alternatively you could just be a bum and buy a premade pie/tart crust but that make you worse than Hitler.

Other Stuffs

To be fancy I like to reserve some of the chocolate and melt it in a ziploc baggie in the microwave. Once it's good and melted I cut off the corner and, using it like a pastry bag, drizzle it over the top of tart. Makes it look fancy.

[Cavadus]

Chocolate Dipped Biscotti

Oh biscotti; you are superior to cookies in every way.

Ingredient Cost: ~$20.00
Time to Cook: ~45 minutes

Ingredients


1/2 cup vegetable oil
3 eggs
1 cup sugar
1 tablespoon anise extract, or 3 drops anise oil
3 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 bag of bitter sweet chocolate chips

Directions


Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.
Grease cookie sheet.
In a medium bowl mix together the oil, eggs, sugar and anise flavoring. Combine the flour and baking powder, stir into the egg mixture to form a heavy dough.
Form the dough into roughly the shape of a loaf of bread. Take care not to tape the ends otherwise it'll bake unevenly.
Bake for like half an hour or so. Remove from the oven and let cool.
Slice your "loaf" into pieces about 3/4" to 1" thick.
Place your slices back on the cookie sheet and bake for another ten minutes on each side.
In a bowl, or tupperware, or whatever the fuck, melt the chocolate chips in the microwave. Try to melt the chips evenly and in as little time possible. The more you overheat the chocolate the longer it takes to "set" back into hardness and not be all greasy turd like.
With the chocolate melted dip the bottoms or one side of your biscotti slices in it and then place on parchment (or wax) paper to set.
It will take hours for the chocolate to set. I usually let it sit overnight to be honest but the process can be expedited if you you have room for the sliced to fit in the fridge. If you try to stack them they'll all stick together and look like dick when you try to pull them apart so don't attempt it.
Bon appetito!

Other Stuffs


If you'd like an even more chocolatey version simply add 1/2 cup of cocoa powder to the batter. However, when I do opt for the cocoa version I also swap the anise extract for black walnut extract. Just gives a better flavor with that combination.
Tastes great dipped in espresso!

Chicks go ape shit over this stuff. This is really one of those crowd pleasers that impresses the ladies. Biscotti just comes across as refined and exotic even though it's easy as hell (easier than making cookies, actually).

[Cooke]

Chicks go ape shit over this stuff. This is really one of those crowd pleasers that impresses the ladies. Biscotti just comes across as refined and exotic even though it's easy as hell (easier than making cookies, actually).

Truth, especially if you don't have any Gelato stores near the trailer park. All I know is that if I said the word "Biscotti" in high school I would've been beaten to a pulp and burned during the next pep rally.

Once the pretty ladies see the nice cookies though, a fair exchange of labor takes place and you receive many cookies many days.

[Cavadus]

Truth, especially if you don't have any Gelato stores near the trailer park.

:rofl:

[Zenner]

I'd say that in about 2 to 3 weeks I'll once again be able to cook. I think I miss it almost as much as you Kav, though I don't think I have quite the skill you recipes display...That being said, I think I'm going to try the chocolate-hazelnut tart for the family on Thanksgiving. I always make a dessert, (or just buy one, blasphemous, I know) and I think this would blow them away...It definitely won't get me laid though.





At least not this time.

[Cavadus]

I'd say that in about 2 to 3 weeks I'll once again be able to cook. I think I miss it almost as much as you Kav, though I don't think I have quite the skill you recipes display...That being said, I think I'm going to try the chocolate-hazelnut tart for the family on Thanksgiving. I always make a dessert, (or just buy one, blasphemous, I know) and I think this would blow them away...It definitely won't get me laid though.





At least not this time.

Hahahahaha, I should hope not. That tart is pretty amazing though; definitely one of my favorite desserts if not the favorite.

I think when I get back I'll dedicate a post to Italian wines and their food pairings.

But no worries, we'll get ya whipped into culinary shape in no time :)

[O'Neil]

I can not cook >.>

[Revoco]

So culinary master, what wine/s do you recommend to go with these recipes?

[Cavadus]

Honestly, I don't drink white period so I pair everything with either a tempranillo, montelpulciao, or (my absolute favorite) a good valpollicella.

[Revoco]

Probably just as well, girls always want red wine anyway.

[Cavadus]

I do have a pretty sweet recipe I'll get later this week. It actually did get me laid and everything. Cooked for the GF on Valentine's day and made a delicious tomato gorgonzola sauce that was overflowing with awesome pancetta chunks and fontina stuffed veal meatballs.

It was awesome.

[Revoco]

I can dig it.

[Cavadus]

Coming up tomorrow night:

Bruschetta (and the difference between bruschetta and crostini);
Fontina stuffed veal meatballs; and
Tomato gorgonzola cream sauce (loaded with pancetta).

[Ironfield]

Coming up tomorrow night:

Bruschetta (and the difference between bruschetta and crostini);
Fontina stuffed veal meatballs; and
Tomato gorgonzola cream sauce (loaded with pancetta).



Damn that sounds amazing Cav, I look forward to reading those recipes. Whats it going to take to fly you out to my neck of the woods and have you as my personal chef?

-Ironfield

[Cavadus]

Fontina Stuffed Meatballs in a Tomato Gorgonzola Cream Sauce with Bruschetta Appetizer

This shit is pretty off the hook and instant panty-death-ray. Seriously, stuffed meatballs? Yeah, and you make them from scratch to boot so people really think you actually know what you're doing. But in my case I do know... hopefully you can fake it and that's what I'm here for.

For those not in the know, gorgonzola is Italy's badass and superior take on bleu cheese. It's not as sharp but much more creamy which makes it terribly conducive to melting in sauces because it mixes so well into the background.

Aside from our stuffed meatballs we'll have a second meat: pancetta. What gorgonzola is to bleu, pancetta is to bacon. It's a round cut of cured pork you can pick up from a deli. Do not buy it pre-packaged because it'll more than likely be very thinly sliced and we want it much thicker than that.

Ingredient Cost: ~$80
Time to Cook: 90 minutes

Ingredients
Meatballs
5 tbs extra virgin olive oil
1/2 yellow onion, minced
3 garlic cloves - 2 minced, 1 thinly sliced
1 teaspoon thyme leaves
¼ teaspoon minced rosemary
2 slices sandwich bread, crust removed and torn into 1-inch pieces
⅓ cup whole milk
1½ pounds ground veal
1 egg, lightly beaten
¼ cup grated parmigiano-reggiano cheese
3 ounces fontina cheese, cut into ½ in cubes
Sauce
NOODLES! This is a pretty great site (http://www.ilovepasta.org/shapes.html) for checking out noodle cuts. My absolute fucking favorite by a million miles is the gigli (yes, like the shitty Ben Affleck movie). Campanelle is also excellent. I tend to steer clear of farfalle because they seem kind of pedestrian to me.
1 28oz can of crushed tomatoes, fire roasted if possible
1 of those small cans of tomato paste
1 large yellow onion
black olives
capers (in brine)
crushed red pepper flake
oregano
basil
marjoram
1 cup of chicken broth
1 cup of Italian red wine
gorgonzola cheese
1 pint of heavy whipping cream
½ lb pancetta in ½ inch slices
Bruschetta
baguette cut into ⅓ inch slices on the bias (diagonally)
extra virgin olive oil
2 garlic cloves

Directions
1. The Meatballs

In a medium skillet, heat 2 tbls of the olive oil. Add the diced onion and minced garlic and cook over moderate heat until softened, about 8 minutes. Stir in the thyme leaves and minced rosemary. Transfer to a large bowl and let stand until cool, about 10 minutes.
In a small bowl, soak the bread pieces in the milk until absorbed, about 5 minutes. Squeeze the milk from the bread and transfer the bread to the bowl with onion. Add the veal, egg, and Parmigiano-Reggiano. Season to taste with salt and pepper, mix well with clean hands stuff.
Scoop 1½-tablespoon-sized balls from veal mixture. Stuff a cube of Fontina into the center of each meatball and roll to enclose the cheese. Transfer the meatballs to a rimmed baking sheet and refrigerate that shit for 30 minutes. If you don't the cheese will ooze out of meatballs when you fry them.
In a large skillet, heat 2 tablespoons of the olive oil. Cook the meatballs in batches over moderately high heat until browned all over, about 6 minutes. Return meatballs to baking sheet.
As your meatballs finish cooking transfer them into an oven safe container and cover with tin foil. When completely done stick the meatballs in the oven to keep them warm.
2. The Sauce

Get your big ass pot for the noodles ready to go. Throw in some water, EVOO, and maybe a few herbs if you like. Warm that water up. Remember to time your noodles so they're done when the sauce is basically done. Don't geek out too much though because so long as you have the water hot the bulk of the waiting game is over. Just get that water hot.
Your pancetta will be cut into round slices so take a big ass skillet pan and throw that shit in there. You're gonna need another big skillet pan but it has to fit inside of the skillet you're using to cook the pancetta. Why, you ask? Because the pancetta will bubble like a motherfucker and be a bitch to cook evenly so ya gotta put some weight on it to keep the slices flat as they cook. Now, you can use anything you want so long as it holds your pancetta slices flat against the skillet. And remember, almost any-fucking-thing can be used for this if you just throw some tin foil on the bottom of it so don't look too hard. I cooked some slices up for breakfast today for my girlfriend and I just used a sauce pan filled with water to keep'em flat. Keep in mind it basically cooks like bacon you want the fat nice and crispy and the meat crispy yet a little tender yet. And remember, you gotta flip the slices and shit once one side is done.
Once your pancetta is cooked julienne that shit.
In a large, deep saute pan add some EVOO and turn the heat way down. Take your onion and dice it. Once diced, add it to the sauce pan and turn the heat up to medium high. Cook until the onions are translucent and starting to caramelize.
Lower the heat to low and add in the crushed tomatoes, tomato paste, chicken broth, and wine. Stir.
Add your herbs to taste. Remember, 2 parts basil to every 1 part oregano. You could throw in some leftover rosemary and thyme from the meatballs here if you'd like.
Slice your black olives if they aren't already. Add the olives and capers.
Add your pancetta.
Turn the heat up to medium and cover the top with a wire mesh cover. Don't cover the pan! We're trying to reduce here.
Let simmer about half an hour.
Now is a good time to throw your noodles in.
Dice up like 6 oz of that gorgonzola cheese. You could add a little more if you like it cheesy or a little less. I generally use slightly more than a half of a gorgonzola cheese wedge which I think is like... 10 oz or so. Melt the cheese until it's fully blended into the sauce.
Add in the whipping cream, mix well.
Take your meatballs and add them as well. Turn the heat way down and just let the meatballs soak up some sauce for like five minutes. Don't go stir crazy because the meatballs are pretty fragile.
Pour your sauce over the noodles (on the plate, when serving; don't mix them beforehand) and serve. I like to garnish with asiago cheese or parmasean cheese shavings. Makes it pretty.
Bon appetito!
3. Bruschetta
Remember to cut your baguette into thinnish slices on the bias. Place them on a baking sheet and set your oven to broil.
Throw some EVOO into a bowl and get out your marinade brush. If you don't have one any clean brush will work... I guess. You can also get away with simply drizzling over the top of the bread. But yeah, put a solid coat of EVOO on top of all the slices.
Throw it on the broiler. We wanna crisp up and lightly brown the top. BROILERS WORK FAST. Seriously, a minute or two is all ya need.
Remove the baking sheet. While the bread is still hot take your peeled garlic cloves and "grate" them on the bread directly. Like, just hold a clove and "sand" it away onto the bread. So imagine the bread like sandpaper. Do this with every slice.
Garnish with parmesan cheese. You can throw it back into the broiler if you wanna melt/crisp up the parmesan cheese a litte.
----

So yeah, this one is fairly advanced and takes a little effort but it's just that fucking good so worth it in the end. Enjoy!

[Cavadus]

Whats it going to take to fly you out to my neck of the woods and have you as my personal chef?


Hmmm, since you're a man... a lot:p

[Ironfield]

Hmmm, since you're a man... a lot:p

Damn :(. Ah well, good looking woman are slim pickings as it is out here. So maybe it is best if you stay stateside and give us none chefs are fighting chance to woo the ladies, via our use of the restaurants out here to wine and dine them. However now I'll have these amazing recipes of yours in my arsenal of charms.

So cheers to you Cav and keep those recipes of yours coming.

-Ironfield

[Wolfe]

panty-death-ray

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[Revoco]

You should post whatever recipe lead to the best night of your life.

[Cooke]

Thought I'd post one that you and your woman (or man) will both love. You also get to set things on fire.

Steak Diane with brandy and mustard sauce

Ingredients

2 sirloin, rump or rib eye steaks, about 200g each
½ tsp freshly ground black pepper
sea salt
1 tsp olive oil
1 tsp butter


For the sauce:
2 tbsp brandy or Cognac
2 tbsp butter
2 tbsp Worcestershire sauce
2 tsp Dijon mustard
½ tsp sea salt
freshly ground black pepper
1 tbsp snipped chives
1 tbsp finely chopped parsley
1 tsp lemon juice


Preparation




Place a sheet of cling film over the steaks and pound with a rolling pin until quite flat (about 5mm/¼in). Season with pepper, but do not salt.
Prepare the ingredients for the sauce now, as you won't have time later.
Heat the oil and butter in a non stick frying pan, and cook the steaks briskly for 1 minute on each side. Draw the pan off the heat, transfer the steaks to two warm dinner plates and season with sea salt.
Now, add the brandy or Cognac to the still-hot pan and return it to the heat, where - whoosh - it will flame.
When the flame dies, reduce the heat and quickly add the butter, Worcestershire sauce, mustard, sea salt and pepper, stirring vigorously with a wooden spoon for 1 minute, allowing the mixture to bubble and thicken.
Add the chives, parsley, lemon juice and any juices that have gathered from the resting steaks, stir well and pour the bubbling sauce over the steaks.
Serve immediately, with potatoes, asparagus, or a green salad.


This is a very sexy recipe with the fire and the steak. Get some fresh white asparagus (when it's in season) or make some sort of potato and you're golden.

[Cavadus]

Ooh, I knew there had to be another epicurean among us :)

Very cool recipe! I'll give this a shot this weekend.

[Cooke]

Hearty Chicken Noodle Soup

Ingredients

• 16 cups canned low-salt chicken broth
• 1 3 1/2-pound chicken, cut into 8 pieces
• 1/2 cup chopped onion
• 2 carrots, peeled, thinly sliced
• 2 celery stalks, sliced
• 2 tablespoons (1/4 stick) butter
• 1 cup sliced mushrooms
• 1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice
• 8 ounces dried wide egg noodles
• 1/2 cup finely chopped fresh parsley

Preparation
Combine chicken broth and chicken in heavy large pot. Bring to boil. Reduce heat; cover partially and simmer until chicken is cooked through, about 20 minutes. Using tongs, transfer chicken to large bowl. Cool chicken and broth slightly. Discard skin and bones from chicken. Cut chicken meat into bite-size pieces and reserve. Spoon fat off top of chicken broth.

Return broth to simmer. Add onion, carrots and celery. Simmer until vegetables soften, about 8 minutes. (Can be prepared 1 day ahead. Cover chicken meat and broth separately and refrigerate. Bring broth to boil before continuing.)

Melt 2 tablespoons butter in heavy large skillet over medium-high heat. Add mushrooms and sauté until beginning to brown, about 5 minutes. Stir in lemon juice. Add mushrooms to broth; stir in noodles, parsley and reserved chicken. Simmer until noodles are tender, about 5 minutes. Season soup to taste with salt and pepper.

Woman/Man sick? Make them home-made soup! Just be sure the veggies are fresh and good quality. Otherwise, it's a really simple recipe that tastes great and will score you big points with your significants.

[Pymamin]

I prefer to bake myself. And I never create anything that tastes good on m own, I just takes recipes from other people. However, if I come across anything interesting I will post it.

I do know a helluva lot about cheeses though...

[Cavadus]

I had this really delicious beef tips in gorgonzola past type thing a few days ago. I'm gonna play around in the kitchen this week and try to re-create it. It had this delciious balsamic vinegar glaze too which just made it pop. And some roasted red peppers.

Expect a recipe to be incoming by next week.

[Impolite]

I like this thread! I'll toss in a couple recipes I like. I can't claim these as my own - I ganked them from other people after trying the results - but they are all recipes I like to make.

Praline Sweet Potatoes
INGREDIENTS
4 cups mashed sweet potatoes
1/2 cup white sugar
2 tablespoons vanilla extract
4 eggs, beaten
1/2 pint heavy cream
1/4 pound butter
1 cup packed brown sugar
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1 1/4 cups chopped pecans

DIRECTIONS
Butter one 2 quart casserole dish. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
In a mixing bowl, combine the sweet potatoes, sugar, vanilla extract, eggs and cream. Blend well, and spread evenly in casserole dish.
Prepare the topping by combining the butter, brown sugar, flour and pecans. Mix until crumbly, and sprinkle over sweet potato mixture.
Bake for 30 minutes in the preheated oven.

[Impolite]

Posted by a guy on a forum I read - really good!

Jalapeno-Olive Meatloaf

2lbs of extra lean ground beef
2 medium sized raw jalapenos
6 green olives(martini type olives not fresh)
Box of finely ground bread crumbs
2 eggs
Onion powder
Salt and Pepper
2 slices of favorite cheese (sharp cheddar)

---------------
Large mixing bowl
Pyrex loaf baking "pan"

Cut up raw jalapeno and olives and place in a small bowl full of water. Let it sit for 30 mins.

after 30 mins...

Put ground beef into large mixing bowl. Mix in about one heaping handful of breadcrumbs. Splash with a little bit of the jalapeno-olive juice (Helps mix it)

Crack eggs and get rid of whites. Put both yolks into large mixing bowl and mix. Add a dash of onion powder, salt and pepper.

add another heaping handful of bread crumbs, scoop out the jalapenos and olives and add to mixing bowl. Mix. Splash some more juice on it if its hard to mix. (You add the bread crumbs twice so you dont end up with an uneven clump of bread crumbs in your loaf.)

Mix thoroughly. The end result should not be watery but like a meat paste. Scoop meat out with a large spoon and place into the Pyrex. Spread it around to avoid any gaps. It should fill the pyrex almost to the top. Add two slices of cheese to the top for a nice cheesy crust.

Bake at 350 for an hour.

[Cavadus]

Pork Tenderloin Wellington

I made this shit for V-Day and it's off the fucking hook. I could gorge myself on this all damn day.

Ingredient Cost: ~$20.00 (if even that)
Time to Cook: ~30 minutes

Ingredients

1 Pork Tenderloin (I used one that was pre-marinated with apple-bourbon flavors)
1 egg
1 tbsp water
5-6 thin Prosciutto slices
salt
freshly ground black pepper
chopped or died thyme
flour
two sheets of puff pastry crust

Directions

Place a rack in the upper third of the oven and heat to 400 degrees F.
Whisk up the egg and water in a small bowl and set aside.
Trim the pork tenderloin of any excess fat and silver skin. Slice the tenderloin down the middle lengthwise, creating 2 separate pieces.
From here on you can either create two wellingtons simultaneously or set aside the second tenderloin piece for something else.
Lay out some parchment paper on the counter and arrange the pieces of prosciutto in the center, overlapping them enough to create solid layer that is as long as the tenderloin. Top with a second piece of parchment, and using a rolling pin, roll over the prosciutto to help adhere the pieces to each other.
Remove the parchment paper and sprinkle the prosciutto with the salt, pepper, and thyme.
Set the tenderloin down the middle of the prosciutto and, using the parchment paper to assist, wrap the prosciutto around the tenderloin to completely enclose in a package.
Sprinkle the counter with flour and roll out the pastry to 12 by 14 inches.
Lay the prosciutto wrapped tenderloin in the center of the pastry on the mustard. Fold the puff pastry up and over the top of the tenderloin, then roll to completely enclose, brushing the edges of the pastry with the egg wash in order to seal. Turn the tenderloin over so the side of the tenderloin with the double thickness of pastry is underneath. Pinch the ends of the pastry to seal.
Brush the entire pastry with the egg wash.
Place the tenderloin on a parchment lined half sheet pan and bake for 25 to 30 minutes or until the pork reaches an internal temperature of at least 140 degrees F.
Let rest for 10 minutes before slicing and serving.

Other Stuffs

None.

Bon appetito!

[Pymamin]

That sounds delicious.

My Fiancée made me Cornish Hen whose skin was stuffed with Truffle butter, roasted heirloom and purple potatoes with Rosemary, and Truffle butter infused Asparagus and Mushrooms last night to thank me for taking her out on Vday.

It was off the hook. (Do people even still say that anymore?)

[Cooke]

Both of you said the two magic words. Wellington and Truffle.

Wellington because it's meat wrapped with other better meat.

Truffle because, well, it's truffle.

You have the recipe for that Pie-man? I'd love to give it a go as long as I can get some Truffles/Truffle oil at the fancy grocery store here.

[Pymamin]

I used Truffle Butter I bought on w00t.com. It comes frozen and mailed to you overnight. I will try to dig up the link to the store. You won't be able to get it at woot.com prices, but it's still really good and lasts for 6 months frozen.

It was pretty simple, as far as number of ingredients, from what I understand. I'll ask my Fiancee about it.

[Achidan]

Well Cav,

I have been married for 7 years, but this is a great thread. Hell It might even win some points with the wife (and her shit attitude towards games) lol.

Now if I can just get her to cook it for me while I play ER!

Looking forward to updates...

[TheShiv]

That Pork Tenderloin Wellington sounds good. I'ma make it. To bad the "Get you laid" part won't happen.

[Cavadus]

That Pork Tenderloin Wellington sounds good. I'ma make it. To bad the "Get you laid" part won't happen.

If you make it for a romantic interest it will.

[Eager]

If you make it for a romantic interest it will.

Be careful, the world is full of wannabe vegans nowadays :P

On topic, I will contribute with some local cuisine next time I'm bored at work. Tbh I can't think of anything really fancy I can cook, not compared to some of the recipes here :)

[Cavadus]

Pad Thai Wontons

I've been making cream cheese wontons for awhile and it finally dawned me on the other day that, well, they're wontons; you can fill them with anything!

Ingredient Cost: ~$15.00 (if even that)
Time to Cook: ~30 minutes

Ingredients

2 boneless-skinless chicken breasts
1/2 cup of diced scallions
three eggs
1/2 cup of crushed unsalted peanuts (don't use salted, it'll taste fucking gross)
wonton wrappers (found in the produce section)
crushed red pepper
pad thai sauce
peanut oil (for a small saucepan one quart should fill it sufficiently, for a larger saucepan buy two quarts)

Directions

Partially (or totally, whatever) de-thaw the chicken breasts and slice them julienne style. After cut into the strips cut the strips into thirds.
In a skillet throw in a few tablespoons of peanut oil and set to medium-high heat.
Throw the chicken into the skillet and let fry up. Once the chicken is mostly cooked because shredding/chopping it with a sharper edged spatula. Think of it like breaking up ground beef if you've ever made Hamburger Helper. Same idea. You need small chunks so it can be easily spooned into the wonton wrappers.
After cooked and chunked/shredded enough place it into a medium sized mixing bowl.
Lightly scramble the eggs, add a few more tablespoons of peanut oil into the skillet, and cook the scrambled eggs in it. Again, we're going for small chunks with the eggs. Once the eggs are cooked put them in the mixing bowl with the chicken.
Dice your scallions and throw them in the mixing bowl.
Crush your peanuts and throw them in the mixing bowl.
Season the stuff in the mixing bowl with red pepper to your liking.
Add about half a cup of the pad thai sauce and begin mixing it up. You can always add more if you feel it needs a little more. I think in the end I had more like 3/4 of a cup of but the sauce is some fairly potent stuff.
Fill a medium sauce pan 3/4 high with peanut oil and set to medium0high heat. Let heat for a few minutes.
While the oil is heating lay out your wonton wrappers on a dry surface and begin spooning the filling onto each one. About a tablespoon is all they can hold.
Once the filling has been spooned you must now fold the wrappers. There are two ways to do this. Once is much quicker but a bit more difficult to pull off. Or maybe just describe without a picture. Anyways, if you were looking directly down on the wrapper orient it so it looks like a diamond rather than a square. Fold it in half so the top and bottom points touch one another. It should look like a triangle now and you should be holding it by the "top" point between two fingers. Now, put your fingers under the other two points and push them up so they begin to fold around your fingers. What your aiming for is something that basically looks like this:
http://s3.amazonaws.com/grecipes/public/pictures/recipes/4910/2190046.jpg
You can also fold them into triangles but you need to wet the outside edges with some water to make a "seal" so the oil doesn't get inside. This is less of an issue with the method I described above. You can then either folder the side corners in to make it look sort of like an envelope like this:
http://thumbs.ifood.tv/files/images/food/shrimp-wonton-04.jpg
Or you can leave the corners out so they look like this:
http://dinnertrade.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/wonton.jpg
Once you have them all folded drop 5-8 into your saucepan, quantity depending on the size obviously, and let them fry until they begin to start looking brown. Don't cook them until they look golden! It's a trick! Once you remove them from the oil they'll suddenly just get darker like 10 seconds later. If you're still unsure just prototype it by cooking one and seeing how it goes. These things cook lightning fast, 30-90s depending on how hot you have your heat. Medium-high should probably cook them in like 30-45s.

Other Stuffs

Serve with a dipping sauce if you want. I don't think they really need it though.
You could also chop of a bit of cilantro and/or bean sprouts to toss into the filling.

Bon appetito![/QUOTE]